Monday, May 29, 2006

Today's Cartoon: Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie Produce Celebrity Baby and Media Frenzy

As I have previously stated, "Celebrity Baby News" is my favorite kind of news because it's like a well deserved day off for the mainstream media ;)

It seems like nothing "bad" ever happens on a day when a Hollywood baby is born, which is why the MSM is able to devote all of their attention on covering that one event. It makes me wish that celebrities would make babies everyday; that way we wouldn't have to worry about things like terrorism, war and bird flu any more.

The arrival of Brad Pitt and Angelia Jolie's baby is EXTRA special simply because of how physically attractive the parents are. It's important that very attractive people have babies because the better looking the couple is, the more media coverage they will receive; thus, preventing any "bad news" from occurring elsewhere. A baby that has a nickname, even before it's born (ex. "TomKat" and "Brangelina") is gold because the media overkill of such a non-event can ensure your safety for about a week :)

On the down side of all of this "celebrity media protection" is the creepy, awkward feeling of knowing simply WAY too much about people who don't know you and don't want YOU to know anything about them. You see, when the paparazzi get yelled at, it's not just them that's getting a scolding, it's me as well. It's not my fault though; I was just trying to watch the "news". For some strange reason instead of finding out what's happening in Iraq or Afghanistan (or anywhere else in the world for that matter), I'm stuck riding shotgun in a '95 Ford Taurus, following Angelina Jolie and her kids around Los Angeles.

It's one thing when shows like Entertainment Tonight and Access Hollywood decide to devote their entire schedule to covering "celebrity baby news", but when the cable news networks start doing the same and try to substitute it for "real news"; It starts to make me feel what I can only guess is how Pat O'Brien must feel, every waking moment of his life :0


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